Hi All, I just don’t know where to start with this one. Some time back towards June, I had both my parents in Hospital: Dad with a broken hip but not the side that needed to be replaces, And mum due to Lithium toxic. In about the 6 month from where this point had happen. I was more or less running the house and back and fourth to the Hospital or on the phone to them as I could not get a straight answer about mum well being. I know I have asked help on here about it, which did help but not great amount has come clear about what they have done altogether to her, no one has bothered to chat to us over the phone or explain it in a letter or in some form of communication. I only got some of what was going on with her from putting a complaint in about the ward where mum was at the time in hospital before they moved her to mental health hospital. It was easy to get a straight answer about dad and speak to him via a mobile phone.
As part of mum recover was some respite care but it seem to have done more harm than good as some of the covid rules that have been put in place she can’t get to terms with and the care home they put her in for a month as the respite placement she admits she did not like it as for 2 weeks she was in isolation as covid rules which did not help with just tv to watch as she could not mix with people at the time. When she could as some of them have demeation and other memory lost issues some of did upset and scare her.(which is fair enough)
*since she has come home friday the 4th December, it has been like a nightmare with her not willing to listen or accept my explanation or dad’s about the state of the house still in bit of a mess and not like a showroom house. I had been trying during the different lockdowns and with some help from OT when they could due to rule changes help me clean the house, yes I Admit it not perfect as she would like but I have been busy like everyone else doing things that needed to be done as I am the only one that is fit enough or able to do most of the work. Other things have hit my family during the time my mum been away with deaths in the family, leaks, boiler being changed,mobility car been taken off us due to mum pips being stop, the Dog being ill etc.
Most of that I have been able to carry on with out no trouble what so ever but with no car at present, I have been using the local bus or taxi service to help with the shopping or go to places like the vets. At the moment with the dog not being right i’m up in the night more to let him out to the toilet some times twice a night other times 3 times in a hour every hour from 12 midnight to 6 am so my sleep is all over the place.
(I know this is sounding long winded but it will explain why I use the name of the title for my topic.)
So with my sleep pattern all over the place, I have been taking it easy when moving and clearing things as I have felt like crap sometimes when I have woken up but also feeling sick. I had told my dad I was going to use this weekend as a rest weekend to try and make my self feel better but it has not happen.
As soon as mum got into the house* friday the 4h of december, she started back up with remarks and snipping comments over the state of the house, as it had not had a cloth or a duster over some place, a pile of dishes in the sink and not the dishwasher,a pile of washing ( Some of it would have been done thursday but I had 3 different things come up all at once, a catch 22 situation )and that she could not go for a lie down on her bed as it was full of different items which I was told by her key worker just to concentrate on downstairs than upstairs at the moment.
Since friday onwards she has not really settle back into home life yet which I know can take time but it’s not easy when you got it none stop like a record about the mess or the state of the house, bring up the past yet again, going on about how she hated being in Hospital or respite. I have gone out for walks or gone into the garden our upstairs to take 5 mins out due to the comments of vile bitterness coming out of her mouth all hours of the day and with demands and trying to stop her to clean things up that I have already done, with the dog not being well and sorting him out I Feel like I am going to hit a brick wall. If things had been normal half the troubles that are being made would not be going on, I would be busy helping out with voluntary work for christmas.
I don’t know who to speak to or what to do next for the best? If I ring someone like the local carers center or doctors asking for help I would be accused of phoning sex chat lines, instead of cleaning up. Dad is going to try and get hold of her key worker to speak to as he not happy the way things are going either but it is hit or miss that either the key worker will speak to dad or get back to him if he leaves a message of late the key worker been hard to get hold of even over the simple matters.
so I don’t know what to do next for the best.