Well said @bowlingbun. I’ve not visited the care home for nearly 3 weeks (due to ill physical health and mental health). I feel guilty not going. But as I’ve been told “Don’t visit if your not well”. When it comes to visiting, once a week is the best I can do because I can’t drive and it costs a fair bit of money getting there and back (I live in Wythenshawe, Manchester, she is in a care home in Salford) So, I too feel like I’m been treated like a bad guy from the care home people. I wouldn’t mind, it was the various health authorities who caused this mess. I even ask them to try and keep her somewhat active, especially mentally. All I get is poor manners off the care home doctor (especially when I ask about her medication and treatments) and disdainful looks when I try to help mum with little things (i.e. helping her eat food). So, your right. It’s damned if you do, damned if you don’t.
Can I ask have you managed to get your carers assessment redone. If you ask for one ,why are they Being so awkward. I don’t know if these things will help .i know you know a lot I’ve been reading all the answers you give to people and I have learnt a lot from you. So thankyou.
I wondered if you rung you local citizens advice bureau and told them that you are trying to get your carers assessment redone and the social workers are being awkward. They should be able to do a letter to your council requesting your carer assessment is redone.
Secondly your council will have a Quality care team .it will be on your councils website and there will be an email address for them and you can email with feedback,with complaints. Write to them and explain what is going on the more detail the better ,tell them also that you keep requesting your carer assessment is redone and it has not been and you would like to request it. And ask them to acknowledge your email. Then the next couple of days they will and they will send your email to a manager to be looked into.
I did not know councils had Quality care team till someone told me a few months ago. I don’t know if either of these are any good to you .just trying to help.
My situation is best summed up as “You can lead a horse to water but can’t force it to drink!”.
In 2018, the Ombudsman told the council what they should be doing, council agreed to do them within 4 weeks, I’m still waiting. No one could have tried harder than me. My son deserves so much better but my health is ruined. I’m wide awake at 2am unable to get back to sleep after the latest discovery. Ten of his 34 hours support are now charged for an “on call” member of staff, who is not at his flat, not someone taking him out! On Saturday I’m going to Devon for a week of escape with my sewing machine etc. just to get away from it all. Driving now means pain and pills but I have to get away from it all, I live in a New Forest cottage with everything I could ever want, but there is no emotional peace here any more.
I asked them to get involved. No response. An advisory service recommended Lawstop. First solicitor wanted all the relevant paperwork, then went off sick without anyone telling me, the second did nothing, the third promised lots but did nothing. £1500 charged!
I know no one tries harder than you .ive read your posts all the good advice you give to people to try and help them the best you can.I’ve learned a lot from you.
With requard to the council and the ombudsman ,you say the council won’t do what the ombudsman said and you have been waiting 4 weeks. Tell this to the quality care team at your council.they will get it sorted have you contacted them. Long story. I will have to put it on. But I had trouble with my council they social worker had me so stressed out I could not cope. I rung the financial team a nice lady answered I told her everything she said this is not good she said write to the quality care team she said tell them everything the more info the better,she said and ring the citizens advice bureau.so I wrote to quality care team . I rung citizens advice bureau spoke to a lady there she said would you like me to write a letter I said yes please she wrote a letter sent it to my emails .i sent her letter with my email to the quality care team. 1 day later I got acknowledgement and she sent it to a manager to be investigated ,she said if they don’t sort it ,then it will go to a senior manager. So im waiting to here.all the hassle stopped because the CAB told them they had to do.the lady at the CAB said if they do nothing ring me back and I’ll do appeal letters.ive found the CAB if you ring and get no where ,ring again sometimes it depends who answers the phone.
Tell the quality care team all about your re assessment ,tell them the ombudsman the ombusman has told the council what they should be doing and the council agreed and you have been waiting now for 4 weeks and could they please sort it out.im sure they will.
Also tell them about your son and his hours and what they have done,it’s disgraceful .what makes me mad .these people would not behave like this to there family members .tell the quality care team that you are not well enough to deal with all this and please could they sort it out. The person who told me from the council to write to them .she said tell them as much as you can do the more the better as it would help me.
Your going on holiday on Saturday that will be nice.what will you be making with your sewing machine ,I’m no good at sewing .i like plants. The new forest I’ve heard it’s beautiful there .i have seen it on programmes on the television .I live in the Peak District. I understand about the pain and pills . I’m sorry you have no emotional peace there that is not nice. ive been there with that one Some days no stress, other days stressed out. I’m waiting for the council to start on me again . But I have my info now.
Who did you ask to get involved but no response the CAB. I look online for my local office where I live.i typed in CAB and where I live and it came up with the number and I rung them .
The quality care team should be on your councils website .there will be a section on feedback complaints . And an email address. Write everything your going through with you reassessment and also with your son. Then tell them you cannot cope with it all anymore it’s all stressing you out. Could they please help and sort it out. they are the only people at the council that helped me.
Them and the district nurses they seem to care but I only see them every 3 months .they kind and say if I ever need them to ring .the last one that came she is nice .she said to me everything you need you have to fight for or you get nothing . She said disgraceful I know .she said everything is money now and it has been since last June when things changed.
I’m sorry about what the solicitors have done to you.Could you write to the financial ombudsman and make a complaint for your money back.if one solicitor went off sick, another did nothing and a third promised and did nothing. Then something needs to be done .does the law works platform have a complaints department you could email make a complaint .tell them that these solicitors have took all this money and done nothing and you want a refund.then if they do nothing go to the financial ombudsman ,whichever one it is that deals with solicitors and charges.i know there is one I remember seeing something online about it.
I’ve not bothered about solicitors. I’ll avoid if I can do. I’ve wrote lots of formal complaints to all the places I have a problem with and they’re all being investigated. Then after I will write to the ombudsman’s about each one.Even if they put things right ,I will still write to them and tell them so that they know how these places are behaving because I know other people being treated the same.
And not everyone can stick up for themselves. If I can do a little bit to help.
I know you have been through a lot .im so sorry you have. But you have never given up .i admire you for that. Try the quality care team ,any problems i have had with the council I just wrote it to them . I don’t have anything to do with them now .they suspended my care lol. Thank goodness i had just started to be able to walk. Yes I know unlawful. Everything the council the hospital have done to me is unlawful . The PALS and complaints team said the council and the hospital had both failed me.they no need to tell me that I already know it. I don’t know where the past 12 months have gone.
I hope you have a lovely holiday in Devon it’s beautiful down there. Have a nice day.
@bowlingbun, OMG. Talk about creaming off the top. Again, it’s money before people.
The council agreed to do what the Ombudsman asked in four weeks, in 2018.
That’s 8 YEARS AGO!
The Complaints Team don’t progress things, neither does the Monitoring Officer, and the Head of LD in the County, who has known me and M for about 20 years, keeps referring things back to the local LD Team. A Subject Access Request revealed that it is the head of this team who is the problem.
@bowlingbun, holy heck! 8yrs ago, that long? It makes me wonder who is in charge of these organizations? As I said, the higher uppers always look out for their own.
@JohnnyBoy @bowlingbun is mega articulate and if she is struggling to get anywhere then I totally despair of the system as she knows her stuff and does thorough research. For me I honestly feel E needs to physically go so far downhill that they cannot discharge him to have any chance at all of not having him back. I know that the Care Act 2014 says no one can be forced to care and I truly wish we could have some ‘no win no fee barristers’ getting involved as I really do feel it would generate column inches.
But surely they just can’t keep treating you like this ,it is very unfair. If this head of the team is the problem .is there a way of bypassing him and going higher. Or asking him what he thinks he is playing at. Who does he think he is.
I thought that Johnny boy when you said oh heck 8 years.its disgraceful isn’t it. I can’t understand why all these people are like this.do they get some sort of pleasure from stressing us out. I mean what is wrong with just giving someone a carer reassessment .does it have to be so hard to do anything . Anything anyone tries to do on this forum seems to be so hard work. Life should not have to be this hard surely.
I’d love a no win no fee solicitor. I’d even pay happily if I could find someone who actually did what they said they would! My Subject Access Request just about my Carers Assessment involved 800+ pages. The first was emailed to me, completely disorganised. I’m not joking when I say you had to read it from the back to the front, right to left. Packed in an ordinary envelope which tore in the post! The second was marginally better, at least it had page numbers and was hole punche, but still unacceptably poor. The third was printed one side only, but still no proper order, not hole punched so I had to take it to the library for punching. Poorly done. 800+ pages. All I wanted was to sit down with someone to correct it and sign it off. M’s Care Plan has page after page with no entries saying how much care he is going to get, and when. If they treat me like this, heaven help everyone else. In Hampshire social workers are paid £50,000 plus an unspecified £10,000 “allowance”, I saw a job advert. Excluding holidays that’s Oberon £1,000 a week!
@bowlingbun hello. I’ve got something that may be able to help you.its a website called LawWorks.org . It is free. The CAB told me about them. I don’t know if it’s any good. There university students that give advice in there final years of studying as experience ,they are monitored and checked by a proper solicitor who oversees them. On the right there’s a list and the top one says free advice clinics when you click on that you go down to the bottom of the page and you fill in part that asks questions ,about what you want ,where you live etc. and then it will bring up a list of universities that give advice on what you want. Need to read criteria. Some only give help term time, some all year. Some by appointment, or phone call or email. Thought it may be worth a look for you.
@Alison_1970, I hope so. If not, then it should. It’s a travesty things like this isn’t highlighted in the media more.
Thanks. I’ll have a look.
@Teddybear, I don’t like saying it, but it is very hard for a lot of us. After all, we to want to do what is right for our loved ones. I don’t see what is wrong with it personally.
It’s not easy when you don’t know the legal goings-on.
@johnnyboy. I know how you feel I’m not very good legally. I just read the laws. Read on here and contact the CAB .i rung to ask them something and they asked me if I had heard of that site I said no.they said it was free, and it was students and universities and you could ask for advice.so I said thankyou and wrote it down and thought it could be useful to me ,to other people.
I know all you want to do is what is right for your loved one. I understand that. And I know you have a battle on your hands ,that is why I’ve tried to say things to try and help. I’m no expert I only know things I’ve read.i could see you were hurting and was and am trying to think of things to help. Even if they may not be any good. The saying two heads are better than one. Well on here there’s lots of heads.take care
@Teddybear, any good advice is OK with me. As I mentioned, I’m trying all sorts of avenues at the moment. Including the lawsociety.org.uk. There is one near Manchester university.
@johnnyboy. Look up Lawworks.co.uk. I told bowlinghun about them .i don’t know what they are like but it’s FREE. they are universities and students, students in there final years give advice its experience for them .they are monitored by proper solicitors .when you go on the website you will see a list of things on the right on site in blue .top one says free clinics go down the page .then you will find a part you need to fill in , what law you want, what area you live in and the mile radius you want. There all universities all over the country. You have to check the criteria. Some only give advice term time , some all year. Some are appointments , some are phone calls , some are emails.
But if there phone calls or emails it does not matter where in the country they are. You could get advise of these people and it could help you with all the others things your doing. And it helps the students with there studies. I’ve haven’t done it yet, so don’t know what it’s like. I’ve been busy writing .but should be ok if citizens advice bureau told me. Have a good day.
@Teddybear, sure thing. I’ll check it out when I get time. Cheers. 