We had a couple of highly publicised carer suicides - both mothers of disabled children here in Leicestershire: unfortunately we were not in contact with either of them, although it’s impossible to say whad difference we might have made.
Gill worked with one of our carers for three years - brought him back from the brink of suicide twice. We were on our way back from holiday one year when we got the news that he’d taken a massive overdose. Gill still struggles with that.
Alison, At one time my husband and I were caring for all four elderly parents all within 6 miles, as well as M. Bet ween them they had bowel cancer, prostate cancer, Alzheimer’s, arthritis, hyperostosis…m um alone had 28 different health issues on her contact sheet if the ambulance was needed. No one ever did a Carers Assessment for me or my husband. Mum even told her assessor I didn’t want one, no one asked me. My husband died from the stress of caring, my health was ruined. Each doctor and social worker had tunnel vision seeing only their patient/client. Not long before he died, my husband said to me “You know our problem? We live too near them! Had we lived further away from our parents they would have had had to accept more help, which would have been freely available.
I was widowed when I was 54, as a result of caring. My husband died.
@bowlingbun , my condolences. How long have you been a widow?
20 years, my husband died of a massive heart attack in his sleep.
@bowlingbun , Oh God. Must’ve have been a big shock to you and your family.
Only a few months after I’d had major cancer surgery. 3 months after he died I was nearly killed in a car accident. Saved only because I was driving his Range Rover, by chance, not my Escort. It was an absolutely awful time, but we got through.
@bowlingbun , thank heavens for small mercies. Recovering from major cancer surgery is bad enough, a car crash and you grieving for your husband…OMG. 
Here’s me thinking I’m the one with the bad luck. Glad to hear your cancer surgery went well.
There were a few other awful things too. Without doubt the period between 2000 and 2015 were dreadful. A new chapter in my life started when, dog tired, I went to stay in Crete for 2 weeks. I slept most of the first week! Everyone knows that my 2 weeks there are “non negotiable”, I have friends who I only see once a year but we keep in touch via Facebook, we meet up in Gatwick before our flight.
@bowlingbun , you must’ve been knackered to sleep as long as you have during your holiday. I can only imagine the 15yrs period (2000-2015) how terrible it was. And here is I thinking I’m cursed with bad luck. Nothing much has gone right for me since mum’s death. How have you been coping since then?