Hi everyone, I’m Susan I’m 59 and I live in County Durham
I have been looking after my Husband Geoff 71 and my Sister Karen 57 for a while and now I just look after my sister as my lovely Husband passed away this march from Terminal Kidney Cancer.

My sister Karen has Rheumatoid arthritis, Myasthenia Gravis and had 2 Subarachnoid Haemorrhages in the space of 2 days, fibromyalgia, hypermobility syndrome, diabetes and psoriasis, the RA has caused her so many problems including the Myasthenia Gravis and because of all of this she has issues with balance, memory, trying find the right words for things, pain management and staying awake.

I love my sister dearly and always feel guilty if i snap at her or get annoyed with her or don’t want to do something but sometimes it’s difficult for me as I have Osteoarthritis in my back, hips 1 knee, ankles and hands, C.O.P.D., and a herniated disk in my lower back so sometimes it’s like the blind leading the blind lol.

Why are you feeling you have to care for your sister at the expense of your own health???

A Kinship carer.

The following thread will be oif assistance to you in that role :

A guide to outside care support … who provides it / where to get it :

Welcome to the Forum, Susan, and I am sorry to hear about your husband.

Yes, your own health must come first. Does your sister have any other form of support? What support are you currently providing? Maybe it is time for your sister to have a care assessment, rely more on paid carers and you simply to support in the background? Remember you need to put your own life jacket on before you help anyone else!

Anyway, lots of questions. But welcome to the Forum. I hope you find it a supportive place to be.

Anne x