Hi all,
Just found this forum after a late night doomscroll. I am 24 and have been a carer my whole life, most significantly for my younger sister in the last several years. She has had severe mental and physical health challenges since she was little, which have manifested in various ways over the years. The latest iteration involved an intense drug and alcohol addiction, which, as crazy as it may sound, was almost a good thing, as it became such a clear crisis that intervention was necessary and following rehab, she has been living in supported housing for almost a year now. She’s had time and support to focus on recovery. It’s a temporary solution to a much, much deeper problem, but for the moment things are calmer.
For me it’s been a strange time. I did not go to university in order to care for my sister. Having the time and space to consider my own future has been complicated. I do think that if the responsibilities come to an end, it’s hard not to feel lost without them. I feel so behind on my own personal goals, I always was so driven but now I realise how much time I’ve lost and struggle a lot with feelings of inferiority and disappointment in myself. Equally, over the last few years so much of my identity has been wrapped up in being a carer, it’s hard to untangle myself from it and also come to terms with the ways it’s changed me as a person, for the better and the worse.
Anyway, complicated feelings! Glad to have found a place where people are sharing their experiences and feeling less alone.