So after a back braking enjoyable day weeding in the garden I asked mum if she wanted to come out in the sunshine…

I’m not sure why I asked as I knew the answer would be no…

Is it an age thing, or a dementia thing ? I can’t understand why she would prefer to sit in the front room which is actually the coldest room in the house as the sun rises at the back of the house, rather then a little warmth in the garden.

Does anyone else have a problem with a “vampire”…who only likes the dark :laughing:

Hi Linda,
congratulations on taming the garden!

No solutions re tempting your Mum out there though. I don’t know if its an age thing or a dementia thing. It is a shame though, as decent light can help with levels of alertness, general wellbeing and improved sleep.

S isn’t a great fan of the garden either, but I am able to tempt him if there is a reason e.g. to help me peg out the washing etc Would your Mum go out on the pretext of “advising” you on something for example. Perhaps her eyes struggle to adjust after the gloom of the front room - would sun glasses help?

If she really isn’t interested - then leave her be and enjoy a bit of “me time” in the garden for you.


Do you have a patio with a reclining garden/camping chair and a table with a parasol, or some shady area?
After I was disabled I was bullied (nicely) by my eldest son to get rid of ALL the borders. It was heartbreaking at the time, as my late husband and I had put all the borders in, after turning a field into a lawn, but I’m so glad they aren’t there any more. Just a quick whizz round the lawn, job done. My garden looks better than it ever has done.

Hi Linda
I think its an age thing. It’s just easier to say no to everything and so their world shrinks to just 4 walls.
I don’t think its a dementia characteristic

My husband has vascular dementia and I cannot get him to come in the garden whilst I am out there. He would rather sit in the conservatory all day. He has a large koi pond that was his love but I can’t even get him to come out and feed the fish. So think the conservatory is like a safe place and everywhere else is scary.X