So I find myself in the unique situation of being implicated of benefit fraud, constant drug use (cannabis) and “24/7” gaming in my mothers divorce statement from her soon to be ex partner. While there are elements of truth to the latter accusations, I will vehemently deny benefit fraud. I have been an on call carer for several years for my mother, supporting her in animal care, prescription and shopping collection, home cleaning, and monitoring her relationship with a verbally, emotionally, medically, financially abusive and negligent man, whom we have evidence of infidelity, and witness testimonies to verify his behaviour and actions.
The more pressing issue I am experiencing is an existential crisis. My ideology, and beliefs have been called into question at the realisation that the man I was deluded enough to call a mentor was in fact a user and abuser. I also have preexisting mental health concerns (Aspergers) that I believe has been influenced by this individual negatively. I am suspicious he has undiagnosed Narcissistic Personality Disorder.
As a result of this crisis, my trust of my mother has begun to disintegrate. Her behaviours are scarily familiar to his own. I believe this as a result of him being equally if not more so abusive to her. I love her dearly, I am scared the attachment I have is fairly toxic, but I am continuing to care for her as best I can. I find myself contemplating testifying against both, as I have been subject to abuse and neglect by both parents, but well out of statute of limitations, as I was a child in a foreign country at the time.
I understand she has care needs, but I am beginning to feel increasingly under qualified to cope with the situation.
I am looking for any advice people can offer. Everything is appreciated. Thanks for your time