Brief (not really) introduction

I’m still barely managing. I don’t like to go home and avoid it until my partner is home. As an example, I finished work on Tuesday 14th at 4pm but only went home at 5:30pm when my partner had returned from work. We found his mother in a confused state with right sided weakness and slurred speech. He started to get wound up because she had told her GP that she had begun to notice blurred vision and poor balance and headaches on the previous Thursday but because she wanted to go to Scotland had refused to be seen. Something she had concealed from us both. To cut a long story short, I told my partner to call an ambulance whilst I medically managed his mother; she was very resistant and would not go to hospital. The ambulance crew arrived and we managed to persuade her to go on a Stroke pathway to Salford. There she had a CT Scan which was normal and her symptoms began to resolve. They diagnosed her with FND and discharged her at 3am. She has an appointment with her GP tomorrow at 10am.

My partner has gotten home today from work and his mother has had another fall whilst going to the toilet and injured her foot and back. She crawled up the stairs. She now lay on the couch with huge bruising to her foot and ankle.

I’m getting very worked up as this is a weekly occurrence now, almost every other day. We haven’t heard anything else from social care and it’s getting harder and harder to manage. I feel as though my partner is not focusing enough on caring for his mother. He was in London all day Monday and Tuesday and today he was in Liverpool. So she’s had very little supervision or assistance all week and he has not put anything in place that could have mitigated any of these risks.

I don’t know what to do.

Can she get in a car?
To be really brutal you could put her in a car, take her to Social Services, and say she’s all yours now.
She has NO legal right to be living at your home. It’s YOUR home, where you should be able to chill out, listen to your music, do your own thing, and shut the rest of the world out. You shouldn’t be afraid or reluctant to go home because she is there. That isn’t what a home is all about.
She should never have moved in to start with.
You are heading for a breakdown if things carry on like this.
Better to move her out before rather than afterwards?
I would also question your partner’s genuine commitment to you if he is behaving like this?
I’m so, so sorry that it’s come to this, however it’s clear that nothing is going to change until YOU force it to change. She won’t, your partner won’t, so it leaves you.

I’m sorry to hear she now has an FND diagnosis. That’s the main issue my partner has, and he does need a lot of help. It’s a strange condition with a lot of variety in how it presents, but falls are quite a common one. My partner went from manual labour work to using rollator/wheelchair and not safe picking up medium cartons of milk. If he didn’t have the rollator he would fall a lot more. He isn’t safe to use the cooker or kettle either.
Your partner will need to sort out something more suitable for his mother’s ongoing support and well-being. It’s not fair on you putting that additional pressure on you, it’s your home, where you should be able to relax.