I have been caring for my husband for seven years - he has multiple health problems, heart failure, kidney disease and diabetic neuropathy. The final condition means he is unable to walk more than a few feet without becoming extremely unsteady. I am really unable to leave him alone as he really tries to be independent and tries to walk, even to the bathroom, but can easily fall. He is very clear mentally and on a good day is great fun to be with but other days he is very sleepy and dopey. I know he feels guilty about the. lack of life for both of us
Unfortunately he has recently had a heart attack and whilst in hospital it was discovered that the crack on his heel has ulcerated. This is being treated daily by the community nurses (who are excellent by the way!) and is now on his third type of antibiotic.
However, my main concern is that have no close family who can look after him and I am afraid to leave him which means we are both housebound. I do not drive due to my own medical problems. He is extremely independent and has made it clear he does not wish to visit a club even though it means I would be able to do simple things like taking a ‘head clearing’ walk.
Sorry for such a long and no doubt boring post but at least I got it off my chest. Many thanks everyone.
Hi and a warm welcome to the forum.
So hard on you as the caree when the person you are caring for is wanting to maintain their independence, I was in a similar situation with my Nan, such a fiercely independent woman.
Are their any befriender groups in your area? Have you had a carers assessment Carer's assessment | Carers UK to assess your needs?
Have not even heard of the assessment!!! Will have to look into it. Have recently applied for the carer’s allowance but am waiting to hear.
I think I really just was having a bad day and needed to let off some steam so thanks anyway
We all have days like that Sue, how are you feeling today?
Today Jim is back to normal… maybe it is the infection. At least I know where I can let off steam when I need to. Thanks for the concern.
Infections and antibiotics can cause many other side effects Sue.
Feel free to let off steam when you need to, there’s normally someone around to lend an ear. x x
A bad day today… Jim could not get out of bed last night well enough to get to the bathroom and had an accident making his shorts wet. This happened twice. By the time I had made it to the other side of the bed to help it was too late. He didn’t want to get up this morning as he was so tired - I left him to sleep and checked him after a while to try and wake him to give him his antibiotics and he had wet the bed.
He had a hospital appointment this morning but I cancelled that and they arranged to cancel the transport.
He has been asleep, and I mean deeply asleep since 6.30. I called our community nurse for some advice ( should I leave him to sleep) and they sent out our gp. He said if I was struggling he would admit him to hospital but I know he didn’t really need a hospital bed, just to get rid of the infection. Just managed to get two more antibiotics into him and walk him to the bathroom.
I expect that he will be back to normal tomorrow, I am just feeling a bit stressed at the moment.
Thanks for listening!!!
http://www.capatexcare.co.uk/kylie-bed-pad/kylie-bed-pads/
Not sure if this link for Kylie bed pads will be of any help to you. It might be worth asking for a bed bottle for Jim to urinate in. Hoping that you are able to get a bit of rest yourself, it sounds like you have had a very stressful 24 hours. Sending hugs. x x
I don’t know if this is appropriate but we use Conveen urisheaths. This is not an indwelling catheter, but a little pouch that fits over the penis and is attached to a tube and a bag. It depends how difficult it is for your husband to get to the toilet.
Jim is now in hospital… he has slept so much that he was not taking in enough fluid although I tried my best to wake him to make him drink - rather difficult. He could not take his normal medication which, as he has several heart meds, made his district nurse concerned. Paramedic called and he agreed to to hospital - normally he would refuse so he must be feeling bad! Now on a drip and hope that he may be allowed home today after he has some fluid in him.
Thanks for the suggestions, normally he can get to the bathroom with my help, but he was simply was not awake long enough to be aware he needed the loo.
Hope everything is ok, Sue.
Thanks for your help… Jim is now home, they decided it was the infection.
He is absolutely fine for now, district nurse just been and his ulcer is looking much better!!
I much appreciate all the help and support I have had here - what a beautiful group of people.
Good to hear he is on the mend xx